A blog a day (#18)

DRIVING

Back when I was in school (mid 60's), my father bought a scooter - a Lambretta. 

Now this scooter wouldn't start so easily, especially during winters. It needed at least about a hundred kicks to start it. I was given the responsibility to start the scooter and keep it ready for my father to ride that to office. Kickstarting that vehicle almost everyday gave me some pain - physical and mental. Why me? Well, I was the only boy in the house and my father was nearing 50 then, so I had to do that job. I think I may have demanded an incentive to help my father. After some thought about it, he decided that he would teach me how to ride the scooter and thus began my driving lesson on a lambretta when I was about 14 or 15 years old. No license, no learner's license also. With my father behind me, I used to drive the scooter in our township in Ranchi and he would guide me as to when to apply brake, when to accelerate, when to change gears, and how to balance properly. This gave me an incentive enough to kickstart the scooter everyday for my father. Over time, my father would also ask me to drop my sister off to the main road - a distance of about 2 kms from home - so that they could take a public transport to college. I think I got a hang of riding a scooter. Never  mind the fact that I got a license only when I was 30! Now this is bound to rankle my children since after I bought a car, I didn't allow my children to drive without a license. 

I did get into some embarrassing situations whenever I gave a ride to my sisters. There was at least one occasion when a colleague or classmate of my sister asked her if I was her husband! Couldn't that chap see some resemblance between me and my sister? And did I look that old? 

Every opportunity comes with some risk, I suppose.

Open letter to Lewis Hamilton

Its the F1 season in India and the media is full of sound and video bites from the drivers. The circuit at Noida has been praised by all drivers and they are thankful they have to drive there and not on Indian roads!

Lewis Hamilton has this to say, "“There must be some fantastic drivers in India, I am sure,” he said, only half joking. “I cannot fathom how vehicles converge at any given point from all directions at the same time and no one hits anyone. They all move away smoothly. Thank goodness, I do not drive on Indian roads.” (comment from here).

I am sorry, Lewis. There are hardly any "fantastic" drivers in India. If by "fantastic", you mean those guys who:

• drive at night with hi-beam always - even when they are driving on well illuminated roads, or driving at 10 kmph.
• overtake from your left on a narrow road even if you are turning left.
• drive on the wrong side of the road with full lights on during the day as if that gives them the right to drive on the wrong side (even though for them it is the "right" side).
• drive while talking on their mobile phones without the "benefit" of a headset or bluetooth device.
• cut across all forms of vehicles to park on the right side of the road.
• double park near the shop and put their hazard lights on - again as if that confers on them the right to park wherever.
• honk as soon as the traffic light turns green - even if they are ten cars behind.

You are wrong to presume that all cars converge, and as if a miracle has happened, no one touches any other car. It is not a miracle. In India, drivers somehow manage to possess two eyes on either side of their head and keep looking at all the three rear view mirrors while driving. It is something that antelopes and Thomson gazelles do in Africa - always looking around for predators. In India every other car is a predator and you are the prey.

We do it because of a genetic miracle conferred on us by a team of God and the Traffic Police so that they (Traffic police) don't have to do the work they are supposed to do - regulate traffic. It is not that cars do not touch others. I am yet to see a car without a dent or a scratch on Indian roads and however careful you may be, you are not guaranteed that idiots are not behind or by your side. We, in India, tolerate small scratches and dents and call it our "karma". In Tamil, we also say "karumam" (untranslatable, but nothing to do with the overwhelming affection for mothers and sisters that Virat Kohli is famous for).

Next year when you do come to India, please come down to Chennai, Bangalore or better still to Hyderabad and drive around at 6 pm near Begumpet or Nampally. I am sure the experience will be wonderful for you when you drive on that race track of yours.